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Thoughts of a worthless sub

The secret about my life.
Veröffentlicht:14. Mai 2021, 10:09 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:22. März 2024, 5:53 Uhr
6684 Aufrufe
I saw you this morning
You were moving so fast
And I miss you so much
Theres no one in sight
In my secret life
I smile when Im angry
I cheat and I lie
I do what I have to do to get by

I know what is wrong
And I know what is right
I would die for the truth
I finally got my orders

Ill be marching through the morning
Marching through the night
Moving cross the borders
Nobody cares if the people live or die

I bite my lip
From the latest hit
To the wisdom of old
But Im always alone

A million candles burning
For the help that never came
Its lonely here
Give me anal sex and the only tree thats left
And stuff it up the hole
In your culture
But loves the only engine of survival
Getting ready for the future
Knowing that this love is real
I need to see you naked
In your body and your thought
And Ill never get enough
When the sweetest voice I ever heard, whispered to my soul

I was bound to a burden, but the burden it was raised
I fled to the edge of the mighty sea of sorrow
I was idled with my soul, when I heard that you could use me
I followed very closely, but my life remained the same

But if I run, where do I go?
I come alive when the sun goes down
Ill be alright if you stay around
You;re the only truth that Ive found
So dont you lie, dont you lie?

I thank you with my heart
for keeping me so close to thee.

8 Kommentare
Pain and Pleasure
Veröffentlicht:9. April 2016, 13:16 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:26. März 2024, 9:59 Uhr
76023 Aufrufe

Torned between extremes;
Torned between light and shadow;
Torned between live and death;
Torned between love and hate;
or just while pain and pleasure embracing

I am offering You my bare ass-
presenting it out towards You.

Pulling my hair hurts my head
And leaves a spark and dark flash of my feelings
Besides confusion, between great desire and intense passion
Caught in humiliating and devaluation fulfilled with pain
while following Your orders.

Before that, You tied and chained me up-
Now Im sitting on the cold floor
Pushed even deeper by Your foot while from behind,
Your hand powerfully reaches between my legs straight into my Venus.

It is so obvious to You -
The dampness and my soft moan as an expression
of my submissive dedication.
A final order from You
to spread my thighs and to open myself completely to You
in this miserably hopeless situation
that hardly gives me air and space to breath.

I dont want to defend myself at all
Today -I just want to follow - to be a tool in the game
Conveniently useful and productive for Your maximum arousal
Ready to grant You every wish,
willingly to withstand every requirements.

Master, whatever You ask, command me -
for time and now -
I am all Yours

2 Kommentare
Gone....
Veröffentlicht:21. Oktober 2023, 11:13 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:25. Februar 2024, 6:52 Uhr
4358 Aufrufe

When one dies, the soul is carried to a distant shore. They say.
Our thoughts and memories find their way there. They say.
Closing my eyes, thinking, searching, praying, but I cant find the shore.
8 Kommentare
THE EXTASE of Saint Teresa
Veröffentlicht:1. Dezember 2022, 23:51 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:23. März 2024, 14:00 Uhr
3056 Aufrufe


“Right next to me I saw an angel in perfect physical form. The angel was small rather than large, very beautiful, and his countenance shone with such splendor that he must have been one of those angels who are all lit up with the fire of divine love; they must be those called seraphs. In the angel's hand I saw a long, golden arrow with fire at its head. It seemed to me that he thrust it into my heart several times, I felt the iron piercing my very being, and when he pulled it out, it seemed to take my heart with it and I remained filled with an ardent love for God. The pain was so severe that I cried out in distress. But at the same time I felt such an infinite warm sweetness that I wished the pain would lasting forever. It wasn't physical pain but mental pain, although it also affected my body to a certain extent; sweetest caress that can be given to the soul by God.“

Words of Saint Teresa 16th century......

I personally do like the idea that sexual arousal is possible outside of the classical settings that we are used to accepting as legitimate spaces for it nowadays.
1 Kommentar
Giving my very best in every way
Veröffentlicht:6. Dezember 2021, 12:32 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:22. März 2024, 5:51 Uhr
6816 Aufrufe

Its three in the morning and I know what its like to be a kid afraid of the night
My soul and your spirit are connected
I opened my eyes
Filled with all the strength I have found
I rise from the ground filled with all the strength I have found
And there is nothing I can;t do except live my life, do my best in every way
But there's this pain deep in my chest that I cant describe, pulling me down
To leave me there in the dark
When I speak to the night I can feel and think
At least Im still alive
I open my eyes
But each day is like a thorn in my eye
because he wont let me hide
i only feel the shame

Maybe I was born of the devil and left here to die
I lost the ransom
I was told that there is no love
I was told not even to look for it
So now Im counting the days I survived
I think its time to run to the river to reach for the well hoping to drown all my sorrows there
I can live for forgiveness, but I cant forget. Lately I have found myself going astray, now I can see the fakes that used me
I have gone so deep where fools go; I had my soul stolen
Do demons so?
You rule the worst of me and destroy everything
They bring angels like you to take my life to hell.
Giving you the best in every way is all I have to do.

I close my eyes, the night is over and the day has already begun.
And there is nothing I cant do except live my life, do my best in every way
0 Kommentare
THE WOMAN THAT RETURNED FROM HELL
Veröffentlicht:18. September 2021, 14:04 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:22. März 2024, 5:48 Uhr
7726 Aufrufe
The woman that has returned from hell is not easy to love. Many have tried. But hardly one did not fail. The weaks dont even have to try, because it will need more strength than those might think they have, you will need more patience, more resilience, more perseverance, more determination as a Normal has. It will requires a relentless and determined love that is anything but easy to defeat.

The woman that returned from hell will push you away for the time being. She will test you according to her thoughts and wishes to find out what he is made of, whether you have got what it takes to survive her storm. Because it is unpredictable - sometimes like a hurricane, an immense force of nature that rests on the rage of its deep suffering; other times like a light rain, calm, quiet, persistent and penetrating. She is one single contradiction, a pendulum that will swing forever between suffocation fear and the fear of loneliness, not knowing herself how to find and maintain the balance between the two.

The women that returned from hell may feel insecure today, even if she wont ever tell you, but tomorrow she might be overflowing with dominance, which she might show them all. She will beg for staying at your side while her hairs grazing behind her ear, dreaming kissing you while protected into your arms. But she never wont tell you so instead she will show you her independence, her need for space of freedom while longing deeply inside for loneliness and distance.
While you were asleep, she was awake, unable to slow down her thoughts, observing clocks and hunt time, make the broken parts fit, to understand everything herself. She fights her own demons and tries to kill her inner dragons. She is afraid of sleeping, because she might loose control. Knowing that tomorrow she will be tired and that her presence will suffocate her.
Therefore she will only need herself. If she talks to you about it, then you should love her.
If she pushes you away, you should love her even more. You will have to love her douptless and straight. New situations and places, people and experiences will make her anxious. She will want to be more independent and overcome her innermost fears but at the same time she will be as scared as a small child alone in the big wide world.

Sometimes she needs to be brave to prove to herself that she has what it takes. Other times her inner self screams for you to take her hand and hold it firmly in hers. But sometimes she may not even know what she needs, and you must then be able to read it like in a book with worn pages, to understand what she needs when she is strangers to herself and does not know.
If she is courageous and enters the world alone, then love her.If she is afraid to refuse to take youre hand, love her even more. She will always live in the fear of not being enough and always being too much - an endless struggle for the middle course. If the scale precipitates in one way or another, it will be ashamed to be itself. If she feels too much, love her. If she doesnt feel enough, love her even more intense.

Sometimes when she does not hurt and the light will shine out of her eyes and her laughter will be a rare and precious melody. But sometimes she will be hurt so much by the trauma in her body; she will hurt in order to feel pain and anxiety herself. The light will weaken and the music will fade. If it is the light, love it. If it is darkness, love it harder. She will always love you with caution but with one foot out the door. She does not understand love without conditions strong enough to endure hard times.
She always will watch, wait and expect you to go first. And if you dont, she has written a truth on her heart that says that you will - And so she will try to sabotage the relationship; she will try to destroy it in order to leave first, trying to hurt you before you can hurt her. Thats the way she keeps control helping her to survive by making sure that she doesnt pass true hell never again.
If she wants to love you, love her. If she needs to hurt you, love her more. Getting out of control scares her. Never make her powerless, trapped or without her freedom. She has to dance barefoot under the huge blue sky, feel the sand between her toes and walk with wolves, while the wind pulls magic through her hair, because here alone she finds her healing.

Never cut the wings off, because as long she has the freedom to fly, she always will come back to you. Love her when it is easy and love her stronger when it is not so. Love her in a way that questions everything she has ever known. Love her because with every fiber of your soul you understand the gift of her love and truest submissivness and what it costs her to offer you her fragile heart.
She does not need you. She choses you, because you have what it takes to survive the storm and because you know how to love the strongest and hardest way ever.

6 Kommentare
Respect.....
Veröffentlicht:23. Juni 2020, 20:47 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:22. März 2024, 5:57 Uhr
17502 Aufrufe

Centern our time day and age, respect is slowly declining day by day. People are becoming more and more self-centered and unsympathetic to those around them. As a result, they have little no regard for other peoples rights and feelings. Humankind has not become better, nore did the world in consequence. The number of people who act without politeness, thought-fulness, and civility is rapidly declining, disrespectful behavior on the other hand, is on the rise. People who have earned great achievements are no longer treated with respect.They treats others miserable and even they are the source of unhappiness and sadness.

Tolstoy said once that respect was invented to cover the empty place where love should be.
Have a big enough heart to love unconditionally, and a mind broad enough to embrace the differences that makes each of us so unique. Respect each other and refrain from disputes; dont repel each other like water and oil, instead like milk and water mingle together.

True humility is intelligent self-respect and which keeps us just from thinking too highly or too meanly of ourselves. Let us reminde how far we have come short and of what we can be .

Show respect even to people who dont deserve it; this not as a reflection of their character, but instead as a reflection of yours.

11 Kommentare
BELIEVE
Veröffentlicht:17. April 2021, 12:58 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:26. März 2024, 9:57 Uhr
7715 Aufrufe
And lately I've found that I'm on the wrong track
'Cause now I can see the fakes that used me
And no feelings came into play
I've been wrong, my heart is torn.
Is that what the devil does?
I've brought myself so low where only fools go;
I stole my soul and burned it;
Is that what demons do?
They rule the worst of you and destroy everything
They even bring down angels like you and me

It's four in the morning again and I want to tell you that I need to sleep, even though I'm here so close to these lonely dark eyes that scare me and mean me no good.
I know so well what it's like to be a child who is afraid of the dark and of the night that rises above you and envelops you like the fog does.
Your soul and spirit are connected. I guess I was just stupid, stupid, I must have convinced myself that I was blind because I couldn't see it.
But since there is no disguise with you, I opened my eyes, filled with all my willpower, I managed to get up off the floor.
You are the flame in my heart-
You are the light in the dark-
Yes. You are the ultimate star - yours
unconditional love lift me up
and take me to a strange unknown place
You make me feel divine and sweet
What makes my life so complete -
I put the fight aside now -to live
You are the confidence in desolation.
YOU are the light of forgiveness.
Yes you are the ultimate star in my life
filled with all my willpower, i managed to get up off the floor again.
And there's nothing else I can't do than pray that you'll never leave me again
'Cause you're the only one who can save me
And because I know it's you who saves me.

7 Kommentare
Why everybody needs a life Philosophy
Veröffentlicht:24. März 2020, 15:52 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:26. März 2024, 8:36 Uhr
15301 Aufrufe



Recently i was told to be less philosophical. So I started to reflect and here my thoughts about why everybody needs a life Philosophy.

What do you want out of life? Do you know?
A lot of people have trouble answering this question.

I truely believe that everyonel needs personal philosophy in life or we risk wandering, and responding to random stimuli and information with little or no impact on our long-term goals.

A philosophy of life is an overall vision or attitude toward life and the purpose of it. All human activities are limited by time, and death. Philosophy is not.
We fill up our time with distractions, never asking whether they are important, whether we really find them of value.
Without a personal philosophy, we end up living without direction

Purpose is life-changing.Nothing gives a person inner wholeness and peace like a distinct understanding of where they are going

I truely believe that in order to get somewhere, you need to define your end goal. That is essential. And the sooner you define it, the clearer everything else will become. A life without a purpose is a life without a destination. A life without a destination might be dangerous.
Finding the right direction in life is an existential problem for all of us.

What do we all look forward to in life?

Dostoyevsky said once:
“The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for.”
Finding the right direction in life is something you create. You make the decision to act. To try. To do something. No matter how small.
At some point in life, you’re going to have to stop thinking about taking action and act. Your purpose in life is to find and do the things that make you smile, laugh and forget time. Even if you aren’t sure yet, move into the exploration and experimentation phase of your life and enjoy the journey.

You can’t put time on it. You can’t force yourself to find your “why” tomorrow or next month, or even next year. But by all means, search for clarity.

In the 1940s, Viktor Frankl was held prisoner in Nazi concentration camps. With all the agony and brutality, what kept Frankl from giving up his relentless fight for his life was purpose! He found meaning in his struggle, and that’s what gave him the power to push forward through unimaginable pain.
A quote by Viktor nicely sums up his philosophy on how people were able to survive the camps, without losing the will to live.
In his book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl says:
“Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any how."

Once you have defined your aims and what you want, it is easier to deal with doubts. Easier not to get distracted from what is important, keep your focus, and keep moving.

Only sustained movement in one direction can bring tangible results.You have permission to change your goal, rethink, choose another, by all means.
It’s hard to maintain any momentum if your direction lacks of definition.

Defining your direction as early as possible is the most important decision in sports. But curiously enough, this is also the most important decision in life in general, but much fewer people realize it.
Living “on purpose” means you live intentionally.

Napoleon said, “There is one quality that one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants and a burning desire to possess it."

In order to get what you want, you have to choose one direction and move towards it, constantly improving over a prolonged period of time.
Maximum speed and output requires a precise framework.
People who have made genuine changes in their lives and managed to attain difficult goals are not stronger, more intelligent or fearless than you. The only difference is the decision to act in the direction of their dreams.

A strong sense of purpose fuels your motivation. Once you find your why, you will be more careful and selective about your daily actions.

May you all find youre WHY.
6 Kommentare
"The truth of a bird"
Veröffentlicht:23. November 2019, 14:52 Uhr
Zuletzt aktualisiert:22. März 2024, 5:59 Uhr
25278 Aufrufe

You can t keep her in a cage,
Dip her wings, tell her lies,
say that young and fragile birds were never meant to fly.
Watch her live behind a rusted door,
latched tight,
Her spirit slipping away so you can keep her insight.
Beautiful creatures cannot be confinded.
Her wings will grow,
She will find the sky.

14 Kommentare

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